Behind the scenes Lok
by Angel Pasta n' sushi
Summary: What are the lives of the Legacy of Kain characters like? In depth characterization and humor. R&R Chapter 3 up!
1. Kain's life

**Behind the scenes of the Lok**

 _(This is a fan based fic over the lives of the Legacy of Kain characters. I'll try to include as many characters as possible. This may be a little random and silly but I've held onto these ideas for a while so sorry if everything is a little out of whack. Other than that enjoy or thanks for viewing anyways.)_

 **Kain's life**

Traffic again…

Kain sighed as he stared out of his truck windshield at the endless rows of cars that blocked his path home. It was towards the end of August and every car on the highway had heatwaves resonating off the hood. He'd only hoped his truck wouldn't overheat in this horrible temperature.

Looking at his radio's clock he frowned; 5:52 Kain promised Umah he'd be home by 5:30.

"Oh move it already!" Kain slammed a fist on his steering wheel that appeared as if it had endured some previous damage from his angry claws.

The vampire rolled down his window and poked his head out wanting to yell some profanities like the time he had cussed out that lady at the Dairy Queen drive through, but to Kain's surprise traffic began to move.

"Finally stupid asses." He growled.

As the traffic progressed he passed the road block responsible for his time delay.

"You have to be kidding me…" Kain glared out of his window as he passed, Malek and a large bitchy woman trying to fix a flat tire.

"Fucking Malek and his aunt Jemima girlfriend…" Kain stopped grumbling as his phone started to ring. He picked it up and groaned when he read the contact.

"She's going to kill me…" He muttered as he picked up.

"Hello?" Kain answered as he half focused on the road and his wife on the phone.

"KAIN WHERE ARE YOU!" Umah yelled in his ear making him cringe.

"Will you calm down!? I'm almost home I was stuck in traffic because of Malek and his turkey girlfriend!" Kain growled making a sharp turn onto his street of middle class homes.

"I DON'T CARE WHO HELD UP TRAFFIC, KAIN! YOU SAID YOU'D LEAVE WORK EARLY…!"

"And I did," Kain cut her off sharply, "I have other things to do besides attend your fathers billionth and one wedding anniversary! I'm still a man, Umah!"

Umah sighed guiltily; she hated it when Kain pulled that card. But besides that he was right.

"Alright, I'm sorry…just get here so we can get ready and leave please?"

"Yes sunshine." Kain answered sarcastically before hanging up.

Besides being a video game actor and vampire lord, Kain was also a husband and father. Though as much as he thought back to his bachelor days, Kain didn't think he would ever take back what destiny had given him.

Kain had one son, Kain. JR, and what you already know a wife, Umah. As much as he loved them both, though he'd never say out loud; his small family was a handful.

Bless her heart, Umah was his Angel, but she could be a major pain in the ass sometimes. She had a tendency to forget that even though he had accomplished much, Kain was NOT Superman. He had his limits and own free will. That put a strain on their marriage sometimes; however, he usually tolerated it.

Kain. JR was a teenager, 17 years old and looked roughly like Kain, (think Blood Omen 2) but there was an issue. He was almost nothing like him. While Kain's passion had been war and politics his son's was music and writing. Kain didn't like to think his son as a pussy, but sometimes he really wondered if Umah's mothering had done more harm than good.

Sure as father and son they watched football together, and drank a beer or two without Umah's consent. But JR. was more bent towards orchestra than warfare. And that somewhat bothered Kain to the point to where he had to talk to, Magnus about it.

Even his prize champion couldn't offer a solution. All he advised was that if Kain valued his good name at all he should better to keep his son away from Nosgoth battle grounds; less he make a fool out of himself and his father.

Besides that, Kain considered his son a good boy.

Kain's thoughts came to a close as he pulled into the driveway of his one story middle class home. He saw their family dog, Duncan sniffing the mailbox before lifting his leg to relieve himself. Kain whistled as the canine finished and happily ran to greet his master.

Walking in the house Kain saw his son at the kitchen table scarfing down a ramen noodle dinner. "Hey pop." His son greeted before stuffing noodles in his mouth.

"Hey boy." Kain ruffled his son's hair affectionately before reaching for the mail on the table. "How was school?"

"Pretty good, I made an A on my history exam." Kain nodded his head in approval at the fledgling. "Very good, and how about…band?"

Kain didn't like to ask about music, but only did so to show some sort of interest towards his son's passion.

"Great as usual, I was chosen to play a violin solo for next months' concert." JR. chirped with excitement.

"Oh that's good… where's your mother?" Kain changed the subject quickly much to his discomfort.

"Ma's upstairs painting her face." His son continued with his dinner as Kain chuckled to his son's answer.

He didn't know why Umah wore so much make-up anyway. He'd always said she looked fine without it, but like any woman she didn't believe him.

Walking into their bedroom Kain saw a pile of luxurious clothes on the queen sized bed he and Umah shared. And in front of their bedroom mirror Umah was standing looking too concentrated on her make-up to pay him any mind.

Kain sighed and reached for some clothes to put on. "You know, if you're really all that worried about time you could just do your make-up in the car."

Umah looked back at her husband and frowned. "You know I can't do that!"

"Hey I was just making a suggestion." Kain said pulling on some new pants. Last time Umah did her face in the car he had taken a "shortcut" to get to Vorador's mansion. Unfortunately, there were a billion of potholes and Umah's face was a huge mess of Picasso. He hadn't made the situation any better by saying that she didn't look any different than usual. That just earned him a lecture from Vorador on how he should treat a woman; oh as if he knew.

Just as he finished putting on a fresh new shoulder cape he couldn't help but feel like he'd forgotten something. Kain thought hard on the subject… what did he forget?

 _About 37 miles away Raziel and Faustus were sitting on the Crystal Dynamics sidewalk looking very glum; Kain had forgotten to wait for them so he could take them home._

Raziel looked at Faustus who was looking at his wrist watch for the billionth time.

"Are you sure you don't need a ride, Faustus? I don't think Claire would mind dropping you off."

Faustus sighed and shook his head. "No thanks Raz, if I change rides now, Sebastian will kill me. He's already being a bitch because I'm making him drive."

"He doesn't like driving late?" Raziel asked curiously. He and Faustus didn't talk much but when they did they got along pretty well.

"Yeah, because apparently "headlights from other cars make his eye's hurt!" Faustus said in a whiny voice apparently trying to copy how Sebastian sounded.

"Don't you have your other brothers?" Raziel stood up stretching his arms.

"Yes," Faustus answered standing up with him. "But Marcus gets home from the psychology office at 9, and Magnus isn't allowed to drive till he gets surgery for his injuries."

"I still somehow can't believe you four live in the same house together; you're all so different."

Faustus sighed and leaned up against the building behind him.

"Neither can I; sometimes they drive me nuts."

 **(I'm going to drop it there so we can continue on with the second chapter. Hope this starter chapter wasn't so bad. It'll get better as time goes on. Read and Review! Thanks)**


	2. Faustus' life

**Faustus' life**

 **(Second chapter to "Behind the scenes lok" thanks for all views everyone and patience. R &R)**

 _When we had last taken a look at Kain's life we had discovered that not only was he a very rushed and pre-occupied vampire, but he had also forgotten to wait and drop off his two friends from work. And still even as the sun had long set Faustus and Raziel patiently waited for their rides.)_

"So…" Raziel scratched his head confused. "Let me see if I have this right; Sebastian nags a lot so you and your brothers call him an old hag?"

For the past half hour both creatures of the night had been snickering and chatting about Faustus' brothers. Each explanation as weird as the next. By what Raziel could decipher the house Faustus stayed in was a freaking circus.

"Yeah we all call him that," Faustus smirked as he itched his right ear. "Sebastian says he doesn't like it, but deep down we think otherwise."

"Honestly I don't see how he could." Raziel muttered.

Shortly afterwards a grey SUV abruptly came to a screeching halt before the passenger window rolled down revealing an angry Sebastian. "Get in."

"Hello to you too." Faustus growled before opening the car door and sliding in. Sebastian saw Raziel and frowned.

"Don't tell me he's going to need a ride too…"

"Don't get your panties in a wad my girlfriends picking me up soon, but thanks anyway." Raziel glared daggers at the rude vampire.

"Excuse my brother's attitude but he's on pms." Faustus stated ignoring Sebastian's fiery eyes. "Catch you later, Raziel."

"Goodnight, Faustus." Raziel and Sebastian glared at each other once more before the passenger window rolled up.

The SUV sped away and Raziel crossed his arms before standing alone under the Crystal Dynamics Street light.

Shaking his Raziel took out his cellphone.

"He does act like a hag."

(In the SUV)

"You know you could be a little nicer to him, Seb" Faustus growled as he took out his android to start texting Marcus.

"Nicer to that blue toothpick?! Not in a million years!" Sebastian fumed as he stopped at a red traffic light.

"No offense but I think that's why you don't have any friends."

Faustus text: Are u home yet?

Marcus text: Maybe.

Faustus: WTF duz that mean?!

Marcus: :P

Faustus looked up from his phone and sighed. "Jackass."

"Oh you finally looked up your real name." Sebastian sneered before making a left turn onto Steel. Ave

"You know you have some real nerve making fun of me in front of your dumb friends!"

Faustus rolled his eyes. "You are such a girl, Sebastian I swear!"

Sebastian glared at his younger brother with no little to no patience left in his system, but decided to take a deep breath and let Faustus' insult slide. "So how was work?"

"Pretty good, we got to try some new voice equipment today; and yours?"

Sebastian sighed before stopping at a red traffic light.

"I had to break up with my girlfriend today…" Sebastian frowned as he looked out his driver side window.

Faustus' usual smirk disappeared hearing his brothers sad report for the day.

"Damn sorry Seb… what happened? I thought you guys were doing alright?"

"We were," Sebastian added roughly as he began driving again, "until Marcus fucked everything up."

(Flashback- during the day)

Sebastian and his girlfriend, a skinny brunette clad in bandit armor are sitting next to one another holding hands in a loveseat. Sebastian appears pleased while his lover looks restless. Magnus is snoring loudly in a large armchair in front of the television when Marcus walks out of the kitchen.

"Oh hello lovebirds…" Marcus stands behind the loveseat eyeing the couple curiously. "What do you two have planned today?"

"Nothing much; we're just hanging out." Sebastian says watching the TV.

"Oh really?" Marcus smirks and eyes Sebastian's girlfriend while massaging the side of his head with a left hand. "Because apparently that's not all she wants to do."

"Huh?" Sebastian looks at his brother confused. "What are you talking about, Marcus?"

Marcus continues to focus on the nervous female bandit.

"You're taking too long, Sebastian. Your girl wants the D!" Marcus announced loudly.

(In the present)

"He read her mind and that's what she was thinking, huh?" Faustus shook his head and glanced at Sebastian who in return was looking depressed.

He sighed wearily before turning onto another street with a crooked street sign at the corner, Crescent Ave.

"Correct me if I'm wrong, Seb but if anything I think you should be grateful to, Marcus. He might've just saved you a ton of heartbreak."

Sebastian continued to frown as he considered Faustus' words. "You could be right; I just wish I could get a decent girl that loved me for me, and not for what was in my pants."

Faustus nodded before turning on the car radio which was playing "Loving you."

" _Loooving yooou is easy because your beautiful, and every time we ooooh…."_

Sebastian turned off the radio.

"Worst song to hear right now, Faustus."

"Sorry, but who knew they were going to play that monstrosity at one of the darkest times of your life?"

"Not funny, Faustus" Sebastian said gritting his teeth.

The grey SUV pulled up in front of a small yellow house. It was two story only to the exception that the upstairs attic, Magnus' room, made up for the second floor.

"Oh shit!" Sebastian face palmed before taking his keys out of the ignition.

Faustus stared wide-eyed at his older brother. "What's wrong Sebastian did you forget your girlfriend at the corner we just passed?"

Sebastian smacked Faustus in the back of the head. "Shut up, you a-hole! I forgot to pick up dinner!"

Frowning Faustus rubbed the back of his head as he got out from the SUV.

"What are you worried about? Marcus will just make some of his famous sandwiches again."

Sebastian turned a light shade of green before taking his keys out.

"That's what I'm afraid of."

Groaning Sebastian walked up to the porch with Faustus and opened the front door to see Magnus sitting at the living room sofa watching "Wheel of Fortune."

"COME ON BABY! BIG MONEY!" Magnus yelled while standing face against the television.

"Magnus, stop yelling in the house!" Sebastian was used to scolding his bigger brother. As good of a warrior he was, Magnus often forgot how to act civilized.

"Sorry…" Magnus muttered as he eyed the colorful spinning wheel on the screen.

Sebastian and Faustus walked into the kitchen to see Marcus at the counter with numerous jars open in front of him; including a bag of bread.

"Dear Lord what are you doing?" Sebastian said turning a light shade of green again.

"Experimenting." Marcus was currently pouring some honey over what appeared to be chicken and relish on a piece of toast.

The kitchen counters were a mess; they appeared to be smeared with some sort of discolored formulas. From only Marcus knew what they were. Almost all the bread was gone, and there were numerous packages of meat and snacks left open. There were several spoons and butter knives dripping with chocolate syrup or butter in the sink, and a plate full of dishonest sandwiches sat within Sebastian's reach.

"Why do these all have a bite in them?" Sebastian growled while he stared at the plate full of so-called "sandwiches."

"Oh, that's because I had to taste test them." Marcus grinned before taking a bite out of his newly completed creation; before putting it on the plate in front of Sebastian.

"Anything that wasn't good went straight to the dog."

Sebastian looked around the kitchen only to spot a large unhappy white and black dog laying under the table.

"Marcus, you know you're not supposed to feed the dog your nasty crap!" Faustus kneeled beside the dog before giving him a soft belly rub in which the dog's tail thumped in return.

"Does Magnus know you fed his dog those stupid sandwiches?" Faustus frowned at Marcus as he got up from his kneeling position, crossing his arms in question to Marcus' method of "taste testing."

"Uh yeah… sorta." Marcus shuffled his feet nervously.

Sebastian sighed before going into the living room to see Magnus drinking a beer, and watching "Friends."

"Seriously, Magnus? I didn't think anyone watched that anymore." Sebastian stared at the television as Magnus took another sip of his "Coorshagen Lite."

"Well I still do, and if I watch it that means others do too." Magnus retorted before snickering at Joey's attempt to play the keyboard.

"I hate to break it to you, but I think Marcus poisoned your dog…" As soon as Sebastian had said this however Magnus had already started for the kitchen.

"MAGNUM!? NOOOOO!" Magnus bellowed while reaching for the sky. "LIVE DAMN YOU! LIVE! Magnus was fixing to do CPR on Magnum (a.k.a start punching his dog) when Faustus stopped him.

"Magnus, you idiot Magnum isn't dead! He just has a stomach ache!"

"Oh…." Magnus stared blankly at his dog before petting Magnum affectionately on the head and turned to Marcus who was staring nervously at him in return.

"YOU BASTARD!" Magnus charged at Marcus with anger traced all over his face.

Marcus ran out of the kitchen with Magnus hot on his tail.

"Sure curse me! You named your dog after a condom!"

Faustus and Sebastian were left in the kitchen to stare soberly at the sandwiches Marcus had left.

"Wanna go to Chile's?" Faustus asked as he handed Seb the keys.

"Thought you'd never ask." Sebastian took the keys and he and Faustus walked out of the kitchen to the living room. They could hear Magnus punching Marcus' lights out in his bedroom.

"Poor bastard." Faustus muttered before shutting the door behind him. "Another typical day."

 **(Ending the chapter to Faustus' life and starting on Raziel's pretty soon. Thanks for any views and all reviews are welcome as well as criticism. I do not own any suggestive ideas or familiar themes in this fanfic. If you guys want me to do another LOK character of your choice, please say so in a review or pm me. Thanks ^^ R &R)**


	3. Raziel's life

**Raziel's life**

 **(Chapter 3 of Lok Behind the scenes everyone. It's been a few days, but I'm currently in college so some of you know how hectic it can be. One minute you're free next minute you have work. Anyways enjoy ^^ I do not own any recognizable material or Lok.)**

It had been almost half an hour since Faustus left with Sebastian, and Raziel's girlfriend was nowhere to be seen. The blue wraith frowned while looking up at the Crystal Dynamics street lamp; the moths and other insects buzzing around the bright light busily.

"Come on, Claire where are you…?" Raziel looked down at the clock on his phone.

8:24 p.m.

Time had never been on Raziel's side; not giving to the fact that most of the legacy of Kain games he was in had something to do with time travel. He hated waiting in line at the coffee maker, despised standing at the copy machine, and absolutely loathed waiting for someone to answer his e-mails or texts.

So to put gently; Raziel wasn't a very patient person. Waiting in line usually had him squirming or itching his head constantly within five minutes.

Raziel was about to call his girlfriend when he got a text from Kain.

Kain text: Are you still at work?

Raziel looked at the text sourly before texting back.

Raziel: Yeah thanks for waiting on me jerk.

Kain text: Sorry.

Raziel text: You know that's a lie.

Kain text: True.

Raziel's eye twitched some before writing a new vulgar message; just as he was about to send it a small silver Volkswagen bug slowed in front of where he was standing.

He heard the door unlock before walking to the passenger side and getting in.

"Hey honeybun!" Claire, Raziel's girlfriend chirped with enthusiasm.

"Hello, Claire…" Raziel greeted sullenly as he put his seatbelt on.

After buckling in Raziel turned and looked at his lover. He was going to let her have it for taking so long; an hour and a half to be exact. After seeing her so happy to see him however, Raziel changed his mind.

Claire was a blue wraith, just like Raziel however she had long flowing blond hair in a messy bun. Her hands and feet weren't cloven. They were skeletal, while her eyes were an illuminating blue. Claire's face was also covered by a tabard; however it was plain lavender. Though she didn't have much to hide; the female wraith had a lower jaw unlike her boyfriend who could never find his.

Claire wore her tabard like a regular blouse; as it covered her entire ribcage and flowed just below where her abdomen would've been. She didn't have torn wings. Lastly Claire wore a violet colored skirt that went just below her knees; though Raziel never knew why. As we already know; they didn't have much to hide.

Raziel watched as his girlfriend put her car in first gear and began driving. He looked down at his phone to see a new message from Kain, and the old message he had yet to send.

Kain text: What's the matter Raz? Just like work; already ran out of things to say?

Raziel chuckled darkly before sending the message he had made earlier.

Raziel message: Go jack yourself.

Kain message: o.o

Raziel mentally smirked at his work partner's reply. He turned and looked at Claire who was concentrating on the road in front of her.

"How was your day, bluebell?"

 _(I'm sorry if these names are corny.")_

"Just fine, Razzy? And yours?" Claire asked excitedly as she actually enjoyed hearing Raziel's reports for the day.

He sighed skimming over his daytime duties.

"Let's see I yelled at Zephon for taking my parking spot, but it wasn't all bad because his car got towed in that same hour."

Raziel went over the list in his mind as Claire snickered at the thought of her boyfriend's nemesis' car getting taken away.

"Faustus, Rahab, and I made some prank calls using the new voice equipment we got today…"

(Earlier at work)

Raziel and Faustus are standing in front of a microphone with a sound system on; meanwhile Rahab is using the company phone to dial someone's number.

Rahab snickers dialing a number. "Ready?"

Faustus and Raziel nod while holding back laughs.

Rahab makes the call and the phone is dialing; Mortanius picks up the phone that's in his personal catacomb. (Avernus)

Mortanius: Hello?

Raziel voice disguised as a large hefty tone: DO YOU LIKE HUMPING?

Mortanius: (shocked and wide-eyed) Excuse me!?

Faustus voice disguised as a scratchy voiced old woman: DO YOU THINK I'M SEXY?

Mortanius: (appalled) Who is this?!

Raziel and Faustus sing in their disguised voices to Mortanius on the other side: DON'T YOU WISH YOUR GIRLFRIEND WAS HOT LIKE ME!

Mortanius: I'm reporting this!

Faustus disguised voice: BITE ME BITCH!

They all hang up the phone and start to laugh their asses off.

Mortanius: 0.o

(Back to present)

Raziel is laughing in the front seat while Claire is looking at him; shaking her blond head.

"Raziel you really should be careful how you use that equipment and your company number…"

Raziel is choking on his laughter; trying to calm down.

"I know honey! But I couldn't help it, Rahab said we had to try it!" Claire giggled with Raziel as they drove into an underground garage; just below their apartment.

Both wraiths got out of the bug and walked to the underground elevator. Pressing elevator button number 5 they both went up to the floor they lived on.

(During the elevator ride)

"Did you enjoy your psychology session with Marcus today?" Claire nodded while looking through her purse for the apartment key. "Yes, we talked about how we shouldn't call people out by their appearances."

Raziel had set up Claire with " " ( . to Claire at first, Nosteratu) to help with her delusional state of mind. Unfortunately Claire wasn't all there. Sure she could do everyday things, but sometimes she had childish moments or just moments of mental weakness. Not that it bothered Raziel. If anything he was more than willing to care for the female wraith.

Raziel and Claire walked out of the elevator to their apartment number 37. As they did a woman with a nearly shaved head and wearing too small of clothes walked out of apartment 32.

"Look, Raziel its Miley Cyrus…" Claire pointed while holding onto Raziel's arm.

"Claire…" Raziel looked at the frowning young woman that came from apartment 32. "I'm sorry…" Raziel apologized defending Claire honestly. "She didn't mean it."

The woman nods, not truly believing what the wraith said before taking the elevator.

"Claire, remember what Marcus said?" Raziel took the key from Claire and opened up their apartment door. "Yes, Raziel…sorry."

As they shut the door and walk into the living room a mowing cat made of bones runs into the room; to greet his masters.

"Hello, Bony." Claire cooed picking up the wraith cat with happy glowing eyes.

"I'm gonna get us some dinner, Claire." Raziel said walking into the kitchen. Standing in front of the kitchen sink he looked out towards the window. Not seeing anything of interest he looked back at his girlfriend; now laying on the floor playing with the cat.

He mentally smiled before opening an empty cookie jar; pulling out a small black box. "I was waiting for a moment like this…"

 **(That's Raziel's life for you. Thanks for your patience and views everyone. And thank you for reviewing, Laura. I do not own Legacy of Kain.** **Whose chapter should be next? Any suggestions? Review or pm. R &R)**


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